Poly-tickle:- The Congress Manifesto

With the recent news around the Congress Manifesto, our team at Hindustan Analytics has managed to do a thorough analysis of all the power points of the Congress Party Manifesto.

As pappu has promised minimum of one year of onsite to software engineers, the deal breaker move has created a new buzz in the IT sector of India. When we asked Ramesh, an IT Engineer, he said, that it was a 10 year long dream of his to go onsite. Ramesh is in the same IT company from 10 years and is yet to receive an on-site opportunity. With the congress putting this in their manifesto, it will be getting a majority of votes from the office going IT crowd of India.

The manifesto also boasts a minimum income scheme for the poorest of poor people in the country. Pappu claims, that with this descision of giving NYAYA to the people, they plan on doing a surgical strike on poor in the country by cheating them once again, and despite various lies and failed promises from Congress party, people believe that this scheme by them must be true. Congress now in responsible hands, led by Pappu and pappi duo, are in for the biggest win in their political career.

The manifesto on page ४२० and clause number ९२११, claims to give special status to all the states. This has made all the states happy. The states which wanted special status are satisfied as they have got it and those who didn’t want it are satisfied as well as all having special status implies ‘special status’ will be the new general status. Good move by Pappu. We at HA never imagined he had a mind so creative to create a policy with the nation at interest in such a manner.

With general elections coming up we will continue our focus at what the Pappu-pappi duo can do in UP and also create a larger impact on the 2019 elections. Recent news has claimed that the revised version of manifesto will be re-launched in 2 days as some say the current manifesto had ‘made in Pakistan’ written on the last page of the book. Also Sonia Gandhi has advised some changes in the colour of the manifesto. The earlier had the tricolour, but the Congress president has advised the design team to create a green cover page with stars on it. Still we, being a unbaised organization don’t doubt their intentions whatsoever.

By Ashwin Agarkhed

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